I'm scared

Nothing really scares me. Not pain, not loss. My life has been to embued with both for either to impact me too greatly. 

Excitement turns to boredom. 

Pain is a major part of the Human Condition. 

At the end of last July, I worked with a guy doing garbage collection in an upscale apartment complex south-east of town. 

10 units, 2 sets of staircases per unit. 20 times, up an down. I was to help him a fortnight, 4 times each week. 

After the 6th time, I took off my shoes the night of the Savannah 48Hour Film Project. There was a quarter-sized blood stain on my sock. 

I tried treating it with Neosporin & bandaids for a few weeks. Finally I called a podiatrist. He initially gave me a 4-6 week time table, which would be concluded with a skin graft. 

By December, he was telling me about a research study he had starting early the following year. I was enrolled and went through 18 of the 26 weeks of the study. At that 3 to last visit (2 remain, a month apart each), he gave me an order for x-rays. They revealed infection damage to my 5th metatarsal, at the very least. 

Infection in the bone. I am scared.