Wishing vs. Doing

I have always been a doer. It is something I learned by example of both of my parents; if you want anything done, do it.

Things don't just happen, you cannot count on (dumb) luck, things do not 'work out.' You make things happen.

That is why Objectivist philosophy has always appealed to me.

One of my problems with objectivist philosophy (in practice) is that you need 'goals'. very early on, I allowed myself to get side tracked from my goals, then abandoned them, and now really do not even really remember what they were.

And now (and for some time) my life has lost all meaning.

Remember Galt's Speech? (Man has two choices)... be a "rational being or suicidal animal..."

(A) Man's life is (his) ultimate value. The three values supporting this ultimate value are reason, purpose and self-esteem. The virtues that support these values are rationality, productivity and pride.

Rationality, man's most basic virtue, is the thing that allows man to be a goal- directed being, and that all of my activities, as a rational being, should support my goals. Unlike an animal, I am not be driven by momentary pleasures at the expense of our goals; such activity is irrational.

Worse yet would be hoping/wishing that things would happen. There is a false humility that exists~ virtuous-less hope: I wish to be rich, I wish for love, but never taking action that leads to these outcomes, nor even investigating what takes to acquire such things.

Hoping is abandoning responsibility. But the flip side of this 'humility' is a presumptuousness. Why? Because when you count on things to happen somehow, what you are really counting on is SOMEONE to do for you.

Productivity, the second objectivist virtue, is what allows man to set himself apart from his environment, freeing him from being subject to his environment. It is productivity that allow man to fashion his environment in support of his life's goals.

As such, productivity is the central purpose of the rational man's life. The most important aspect of productive work is the fullest and most purposeful use of my mind.

And it is my (current) lack of productivity that is getting me down. Why?

The third Objectivist virtue, Pride, is developed by "acquire(ing) the values of character that make (my) life worth sustaining." Self esteem being a primary Objectivist value, supporting the Objectivist premise that "the achievement of (my) own happiness is (my) highest purpose.

In my current state, I have abandoned rationality, am unproductive and lack pride.

Therefore, I am living like an animal, subject to my environment, only living for momentary pleasure.

As such, no longer a rational being, I am falling into the realm of a suicidal animal...

I wish things were different. And I am not a wisher, I am a doer. And that is a problem.